Socially Savvy

Thank-You Note Etiquette

2012-01-30T00:07:00.000-05:00

The secret to success in life is The Thank-You Note!

www.petitepapery.com

To be Socially Savvy you must know that writing thank-you notes are a must and do remember: The sooner you send ... the sweeter it is for the receiver!
There are many tips to remember but here's a few that will keep you going in the right direction:

Keep stationery cards and stamps at your fingertips.
Write only on the face or front of the card - never the back.
First sentence should start with Thank-you.
Date goes at bottom left. (yes, it does)
Your return address goes on back flap of envelope.
Use black or blue ink for more formality, and make sure your stationery reflects your image
Remember correct forms of address: Ms. Joy Weaver, Mrs. James Weaver-(never Mrs. Joy Weaver) and Miss Joy Weaver (if I'm under 18 yrs old)

Here's a example:
Dear Nicki,
Thank you for the perfect birthday gift! You know exactly what to give to a girl who is addicted to handbags. I adore my new bag and will carry it smiling as I remember the fun surprise birthday lunch.
Thrilled and very happy!

All my best,

Joy

January 31st, 2012

Hello Beautiful!

2012-01-22T02:09:00.000-05:00

Have a beautiful weekend sweet friends,

and don't forget to count your blessings

- one by one.

xoJoy

2012-01-14T18:26:00.003-05:00

Did you know that January is
National Hot Tea Month?

If you were invited to “take” Tea at a party would you be confident enough to navigate the event? Let’s take a moment to polish-up on our tea-time manners.

First we must know the terminology – there are various types of teas parties:

Afternoon Tea is served in the U.S. typically between the afternoon hours of three o’clock

and five o’clock. A variety of teas are served along with three distinct courses – first, finger

sandwiches are eaten, scones are next, and finally the sweet treat of pastries. In addition,

afternoon tea is sometimes called “low tea” because it is served at low tables placed beside armchairs.

Afternoon tea has been around for many centuries, but became popular in the 1840’s by Anna, the seventh Duchess of Bedford, who suffered hunger pains during the long afternoons between lunch and the late evening meal. It became the “it “ thing to do and eventually turned into a social affair among the English aristocracy.

High Tea - remember the biggest faux pas is to refer to afternoon tea as “high tea.” (You will be looked down upon as a novice tea drinker) Often times the term “high tea” is misused by people who want tea-time to sound more refined. Note to self: “high tea” is a hearty, simple, sit-down meal that the Industrial Revolution workers of the 19th century originated. The workers came home in the late afternoon from the fields, factories, and mines starved after a long and hard day of work. Traditionally the high tea meal was served in the late afternoon. It was set-up family style with tea to drink and meat to eat, now known as a supper buffet.

Royal Tea is a choice of tea and a four-course menu of finger sandwiches, scones, sweets, desserts and a glass of champagne or sherry. The addition of the glass of champagne or sherry is the distinction of “royal tea.”

Light Tea is a lighter version of afternoon tea. The menu excludes the fingers sandwiches but includes scones, sweets, and of course a variety of teas.

There are various ways to serve the food at a tea. A savvy host knows an easy and elegant way to present each course is on a tiered stand. The first course eaten is from the bottom tier and we work our way up.

•The first tier (bottom) is reserved for the finger sandwiches.

•The second tier (middle) holds the scones.

•The third tier (top) is for the small pasties, tarts and other bite-size sweet desserts.

There are several “nevers” to remember:

•Never fill your cup to the rim – it will only spill onto the saucer creating a dilemma.

•Never stir so others can hear it. Do not allow the teaspoon to touch the sides of the cup. Quietly stir in a little figure-eight

motion and place the spoon on the front-side of your cup.

•Never cradle the cup with your fingers.

•Never swirl the tea around in the cup as if it were a wine glass.

•Never-ever bounce the tea bag up and down in your cup to help the steeping process.

•Never drain a tea bag by winding the string around a spoon.

•Never place your empty cup, saucer and plate back on the tea table when you leave. The tea table is the display for the tea and

food and should remain beautiful through the tea time.

There are also several “always” we should adhere to at tea-time:

•Always keep your tea cup and saucer close together, do not separate more than 12 inches apart. For example: if you are sitting

on a sofa and lean back – pick up your saucer too, or if your stand up, do not leave the saucer sitting on the table.

•Always hold your saucer (with the teacup) in the palm of your hand at waist level and sip. (a silent sip!)

•Always request the tea bag be placed in the teapot first and the hot water added.

•Always pour tea in your cup first in order to judge the strength before adding lemon, sugar or milk.

•Always use lemon slices in your cup, instead of wedges.

•The handle of the spoon and the handle of the cup point to 4 o’clock.

•Always take your spoon out of your cup after stirring, then place your spoon in front of your cup

•Always request a saucer to hold the used tea bag, sugar wrappers or any disposables used.

•Always write your host a thank-you note after the tea party.

Oh yes, and remember one more thing ... Do not raise your pinky finger up when holding a tea cup. It will guarantee you a place in the tea drinkers “hall of shame!”

So what is your favorite flavor of tea?
xoJoy

What's Your Word?

2012-01-05T01:20:00.001-05:00

Last year I asked what your one word was for the year. This year I ask the same question.

My word is: Grateful

There is not enough space on the internet for me to list all the ways for which I am grateful. It includes my blog friends, husband, friends, family, clients, but above all to The Lord.

Eph 3:20 And now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly more that I could ever ask or imagine according to the power that is at work in me through Christ Jesus.

What is your 2012 word?

Host/Hostess Etiquette Tips

2011-12-29T00:10:00.001-05:00

This is the week for dinner parties - be prepared with simple hosting tips.

For the host/hostess:

· Warmly welcome each guest atthe door—the welcome sets the tone for the entire night. Also remember to walk each guest to the front door to say farewell at the end of the night . Very important!

· Make properintroductions. Prepare in advance - know how to create common ground between guests.

· The host and hostess sit on opposite ends of the table, or across from each other at a round table.

· Seat the guestof honor (should you have one) to sit to your right.

· Take intoconsideration each guest’s personality so the conversations will flow. In otherwords, do not seat two introverts side by side, and you should not put twodrama queens together.

· Also, remember toseat your guests male/female and to seat couples apart.

· Place cards areappropriate so your guest knows where to sit, or verbally tell each guest theirdesignated seat.

· The host/hostessshould remember not to open hostess gifts in the presence ofcompany (also, you are not required to send a thank-you note for this gift)

Happy Hosting!

xoJoy

Merry Christmas to You

2011-12-25T00:04:00.000-05:00

May your Christmas be Merry and Bright and above all POLITE!

xoJoy

Dinner Party Etiquette

2011-12-13T00:40:00.001-05:00

Socially Savvy Tips: What you must remember when you are invited to a Christmas or holiday dinner party?

photo from www.southernliving.com

For the invited guest:
BE ON TIME! It is ahuge faux pas to be late for a dinner party; however, if you have an emergency,call immediately to let the host/hostess know you will be late.

Bring a host/hostess gift. (Do not bringflowers unless they are in a vase.) This is a small token of appreciation forthe time and effort of hosting the party.

Everyone—turn yourcell phone on manner mode.

Do not start to eatuntil everyone has been served and your host or hostess
picks up his or herfirst utensil.

Do not dominate theconversation(s) at the dining table. Allow others to talk, too!

Make it a pointto talk to the person on each side of you for the same amount of time.

Compliment thehost/hostess on the food. (Don’t go overboard—your compliments will
soundinsincere!)

Pace yourself—nevereat faster or slower than everyone else.

Never eat and run;stay to visit after the meal.

Remember, if youmust drink—know your limit on alcohol and do not go over it.

Write a thank-younote to the host/hostess immediately afterwards.

Perhaps you are the hostess - your tips are up next!
Merry Christmas! xoJoy

2011-12-05T14:32:00.001-05:00

Come have lunch this Wednesday at The Tower Club from 11:45am to 12:45pm. Meet new friends and get your Christmas polish on.

See you there!

Stay Calm & Sparkle On!

2011-11-29T10:40:00.001-05:00

Tonight's the night to get your Sparkle On! A night of friends and fun to kick off the Christmas party season. Join me at Prestonwood Dallas at 6:45pm (no reservation needed) and we will bask in the fabulousness of delicious holiday recipes, Christmas traditions, and polish up on Socially Savvy tips so we can ...

Stay Calm & SPARKLE ON!

xoJoy

Thankful for YOU!

2011-11-24T22:47:00.001-05:00

Happy Thanksgiving to all my blog friends. I am very THANKFUL for you!
Today was a wonderful day spent with family and friends. And guess what ... we get to have two more Thanksgiving celebrations Friday and Saturday. For all of you who will continue your Thanksgiving celebrations through-out the weekend. Here's a message for you ....

xoJoy

Thanksgiving Manners

2011-11-22T19:05:00.001-05:00

WhenAmericans were asked: What is your most favorite holiday? By far Thanksgivingranked first.
For the most part, it is so popular because there is nogift giving, just visiting and eating!

Althoughexcellent manners should be a part of our everyday habits, the holiday seasoncalls for more advanced awareness of civility. The basics are essential andquite frankly expected especially at Thanksgiving dinner!

Arrive at Thanksgiving dinner on time. (how embarrassing to interrupt the meal)
Never bring a guest that is notexpected. (what a shocker!)
Take a well thought out hostess gift. (do not show up empty handed)
Don’t switch out place sittingcards. (set where the host puts your name-it's there for a reason.
Never start eating before the host/hostess. (pick up your first utensil only after he/she does)
BMW is not your car - it is an acronym for Bread, (on left) Meal, (in middle) Water (on the right)
And remember ALWAYS pass to theright. (and the salt & pepper always stay together, no matter what!)

Yes, these are just a few of the basics ... but what about the mannersthat nobody dares to discuss.
Remember- It is Thanksgiving! Put away the Blackberry’s, i-Phones and all text toysjust for this one day, and especially during the Thanksgiving meal. Nothingsays, "I don't care” more than ignoring the people sitting right in frontof you.

Therewas a time when families spent this one day of the year visiting and catchingup on details of each other’s lives. Unfortunately, retailers have enticed theearly bird Christmas shopper by opening stores on Thanksgiving afternoon inorder to make an extra buck. Whatever happened to pumpkin pie and footballgames? As a reminder, the malls will stay open late during the holiday season.Do not fall into the pressure of a retailer persuading you that ThanksgivingDay is the only time they will offer their really big sale.

Ina nation where the divorce rate is over 50%, remember to refrain from bringingup past wives, husbands, relationships, weddings, funerals, experiences and occurrencesthat will only promote friction. Think before you speak, your next conversationcould be a land mine waiting to explode. You certainly do not want to be theculprit of a dreadful Thanksgiving Day disagreement that goes down in thefamily album as a bad memory.

More manners tomorrow to prepare you for your big Thanksgiving weekend ahead!

xoJoy

Party Etiquette Tip

2011-11-16T22:08:00.001-05:00

Are you invited to a party?

A guest's duty: Mix, mingle & make dazzling conversation -

not about yourself.

Photo: we heart it

xoJoy

Engagement Party Etiquette

2011-11-13T18:42:00.001-05:00

Going to an engagement party? This is NOT an occasion to take a gift to the couple.
It is not a shower.
The party is given by the family to announce the engagement.

However, if the party is being held in a home - don't forget to take a host/hostess gift with a card enclosed.
And please do not forget to write a thank-you note after the party to thank the host/hostess for including you in the celebration.

xoJoy

Kathy Ireland

2011-11-10T21:28:00.001-05:00

Celebrating Life Luncheon

Today was a very special day in Dallas. Kathy Ireland was here specifically to speak to The Council for Life. She has a fantastic Life Affirming message everyone needs to hear.

We found out very quickly that Kathy is not just beautiful on the outside, but her heart is even more beautiful. Those of us at Table 8 had the best seat in the entire ballroom - thanks to our dear friend Amy. (Many of us get to do lots of extra fun things because of Amy) Thank you Amy and Thank you Kathy!

Kathy & me. I'm not really that short (am I?) & she is ... really that tall.

xoJoy

2011-11-07T15:57:00.000-05:00

It’s that time of year to set a date for your upcoming Thanksgiving, Christmas party, or holiday event & send out a hold-the-date card or email.

2011-11-06T22:39:00.001-05:00

Preparing for the week ahead?

Remember: Keep your priorities in order!

xoJoy

Partner's Card

2011-11-05T00:47:00.001-04:00

If you live in Dallas/Fort Worth you very well know this has been Partner's Card Week. I have been hitting the shops along with every other person in DFW saving at least 20% on everything. All the proceeds go to The Family Place. It ends tomorrow so I will have much to report. Until then ... All my best, xoJoy

2011-10-31T09:55:00.006-04:00

Wishing each of you a faBOOlous Halloween!

Laduree

2011-10-24T19:58:00.003-04:00

Do you love Paris? Yes, I knew you did!
I'm dreaming of carmel with salted butter macaroons and tea at Laduree.
http://www.laduree.fr/

So what is your favorite flavor macaroon?

Another thing that makes me happy - their website.
Oh! When the gift opens let your heart flutter - enjoy!
http://www.laduree.fr/
xoJoy

Burnt Orange Eiffel Tower

2011-10-13T22:46:00.001-04:00

A Burnt Orange Eiffel Tower by the light of the Paris moon!
If you happen to live with a Texas Longhorn fan, you know the obsession that comes along with the territory. It's all about burnt-orange!

The funniest thing happened when we were just in Paris on a river boat cruise on the Seine River. Our boat took us right up to the bank to get a good look at the Eiffel Tower. The moment we were even with it - it turned BURNT ORANGE and started to blink. According to my dear Longhorn crazed husband, this was done all for him - only The Lord above could have arranged this happening and it was just for him!

I went along with the entire concept and agreed that The Lord loves JHW so much that He arranged the burnt orange Eiffel Tower all for him, but I also suggested we need to keep praying for the Longhorns, because their current football team is ~~pitiful~~ needs Divine help.

Renamed The Longhorn Tower (of course!)

The French Will Never Forget

2011-10-11T23:25:00.000-04:00

An Emotional Reminder

We were in Paris over 9/11 last month. Much to our surprise, two mock-up structures were built by the Persians in front of the Eiffel Tower in commemoration of the 10th Anniversary. The tear flowed as our bus stopped right in front. People from everywhere cheered to honor 9/11/2001, and the French commemoration to it. Thank you France!

It was an emotional reminder that the entire world was effected by this horrific tragedy.

Photograph from 9/11/11

September 11, 2001 - The French Will Never Forget

iSad - RIP Steve Jobs

2011-10-05T21:43:00.001-04:00

The brilliant Steve Jobs passed away today. It is a great reminder that life is fleeting and no matter how smart or rich we are, we must be prepared.

"Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything--all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure--these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important." - Steve Jobs

10 Golden Lessons From Steve Jobs

““I think we’re having fun. I think our customers really like our products. And we’re always trying to do better.”

- Steve Jobs

His accomplishments and character helped define a generation and change the world. He is co-founder of the fairytale company we now know as Apple Computers. And he is the visionary of the personal computers world that led the entire computer hardware and software industry to restructure itself.

This man with boundless energy and charisma is also a master of hype, hyperbole and the catchy phrase. And even when he’s trying to talk normally, brilliant verbiage comes tumbling out.

Here’s a selection of some of the most insanely great things he said, golden lessons to help you succeed in life, Jobs-style:

“1. Steve Jobs said: “Innovation distinguishes between a leader and a follower.”

Innovation has no limits. The only limit is your imagination. It’s time for you to begin thinking out of the box. If you are involved in a growing industry, think of ways to become more efficient; more customer friendly; and easier to do business with. If you are involved in a shrinking industry – get out of it quick and change before you become obsolete; out of work; or out of business. And remember that procrastination is not an option here. Start innovating now!

2. Steve Jobs said: “Be a yardstick of quality. Some people aren’t used to an environment where excellence is expected.”

There is no shortcut to excellence. You will have to make the commitment to make excellence your priority. Use your talents, abilities, and skills in the best way possible and get ahead of others by giving that little extra. Live by a higher standard and pay attention to the details that really do make the difference. Excellence is not difficult – simply decide right now to give it your best shot – and you will be amazed with what life gives you back.

3. Steve Jobs said: “The only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.”

I’ve got it down to four words: “Do what you love.” Seek out an occupation that gives you a sense of meaning, direction and satisfaction in life. Having a sense of purpose and striving towards goals gives life meaning, direction and satisfaction. It not only contributes to health and longevity, but also makes you feel better in difficult times. Do you jump out of bed on Monday mornings and look forward to the work week? If the answer is ‘no’ keep looking, you’ll know when you find it.

4. Steve Jobs said: “You know, we don’t grow most of the food we eat. We wear clothes other people make. We speak a language that other people developed. We use a mathematics that other people evolved… I mean, we’re constantly taking things. It’s a wonderful, ecstatic feeling to create something that puts it back in the pool of human experience and knowledge.”

Live in a way that is ethically responsible. Try to make a difference in this world and contribute to the higher good. You’ll find it gives more meaning to your life and it’s a great antidote to boredom. There is always so much to be done. And talk to others about what you are doing. Don’t preach or be self-righteous, or fanatical about it, that just puts people off, but at the same time, don’t be shy about setting an example, and use opportunities that arise to let others know what you are doing.

5. Steve Jobs said: “ ‘Beginner’s mind.’ It’s wonderful to have a beginner’s mind.”

It is the kind of mind that can see things as they are, which step by step and in a flash can realize the original nature of everything. Beginner’s mind is the mind that is innocent of preconceptions and expectations, judgments and prejudices. Think of beginner’s mind as the mind that faces life like a small child, full of curiosity and wonder and amazement.

6. Steve Jobs said: “We think basically you watch television to turn your brain off, and you work on your computer when you want to turn your brain on.”

Reams of academic studies over the decades have amply confirmed television’s pernicious mental and moral influences. And most TV watchers know that their habit is mind-numbing and wasteful, but still spend most of their time in front of that box. So turn your TV off and save some brain cells. But be cautious, you can turn your brain off by using a computer also. Try and have an intelligent conversation with someone who plays first person shooters for 8 hours a day. Or auto race games, or role-playing games.

7. Steve Jobs said: “I’m the only person I know that’s lost a quarter of a billion dollars in one year…. It’s very character-building.”

Don’t equate making mistakes with being a mistake. There is no such thing as a successful person who has not failed or made mistakes, there are successful people who made mistakes and changed their lives or performance in response to them, and so got it right the next time. They viewed mistakes as warnings rather than signs of hopeless inadequacy. Never making a mistake means never living life to the full.

8. Steve Jobs said: “I would trade all of my technology for an afternoon with Socrates.”

Over the last decade, numerous books featuring lessons from historical figures have appeared on the shelves of bookstores around the world. And Socrates stands with Leonardo da Vinci, Nicholas Copernicus, Charles Darwin and Albert Einstein as a beacon of inspiration for independent thinkers. But he came first. Cicero said of Socrates that, “He called philosophy down from the skies and into the lives of men.” So use Socrates’ principles in your life, your work, your learning, and your relationships. It’s not about Socrates, it’s really about you, and how you can bring more truth, beauty and goodness into your life everyday.

9. Steve Jobs said: “We’re here to put a dent in the universe. Otherwise why else even be here?”

Did you know that you have big things to accomplish in life? And did you know that those big things are getting rather dusty while you pour yourself another cup of coffee, and decide to mull things over rather than do them? We were all born with a gift to give in life, one which informs all of our desires, interests, passions and curiosities. This gift is, in fact, our purpose. And you don’t need permission to decide your own purpose. No boss, teacher, parent, priest or other authority can decide this for you. Just find that unique purpose.

10. Steve Jobs said: “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

Are you tired of living someone else’s dream? No doubt, its your life and you have every right to spend it in your own individual way without any hurdles or barriers from others. Give yourself a chance to nurture your creative qualities in a fear-free and pressure-free climate. Live a life that YOU choose and be your own boss.

Each lesson might be difficult to integrate into your life at first, but if you ease your way into each lesson, one at a time, you’ll notice an immediate improvement in your overall performance. So go ahead, give them a try.

My LV Birthday Cake

2011-09-04T21:53:00.001-04:00

It was a biggie - the second anniversary of my 25th birthday. (add it up)
What a fun day! Katherine had a surprise birthday party lunch for me at the Ritz Carlton garden room. (The most beautiful room known to mankind) 12 fabulous friends attended and check out my cake ...

www.deliciouscakes.com or www.tartbakerydallas.com

Surprise party planner extraordinaire and old(er) birthday girl.

Thank you to the best friend in the whole world for loving me enough to make me feel fabulous and special. Thank you to friends who surprised me and celebrated a 1/2 century of my life. You know who you are ... and so do I.

This is a wonderful quote on friendship:
I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar.
Robert Brault

Two Weeks Until Paris

2011-08-24T23:33:00.000-04:00

The countdown is officially on now - just two more weeks until we leave for Paris.
Any suggestions?

Double the Fun!

2011-07-08T01:02:00.000-04:00

Just Saw A Double Rainbow.
As many of my followers know - we spend the summers in Colorado to avoid the Texas heat. I couldn't wait to show you the beauty outside my kitchen window. Amazing!

God's reminder and promise to us.

Got to see my first bear - from 100 yards away!
(thank goodness - he decides to go the other way)

I'll never get tired of seeing the beauty of God's creation on our morning hikes!

Rocky Mountain High ...
xoJoy

Happy Flag Day!

2011-06-14T13:59:00.000-04:00

Flag Etiquette
How do you know what you don't know? It is summertime and we will have the opportunity to fly Old Glory to show our patriotism. Here's how to do it correctly:

Fun Facts:

The flag should never be flown upside down only as a distress signal.
The flag should not be used as a drapery, or for covering a speakers desk, draping a platform, or for any decoration in general. Bunting of blue, white and red stripes is available for these purposes. The blue stripe of the bunting should be on the top.
The flag should never be used for any advertising purpose. It should not be embroidered, printed or otherwise impressed on such articles as cushions, handkerchiefs, napkins, boxes, or anything intended to be discarded after temporary use. Advertising signs should not be attached to the staff or halyard
The flag should not be used as part of a costume or athletic uniform, except that a flag patch may be used on the uniform of military personnel, fireman, policeman and members of patriotic organizations.
The flag should never have placed on it, or attached to it, any mark, insignia, letter, word, number, figure, or drawing of any kind.
The flag should never be used as a receptacle for receiving, holding, carrying, or delivering anything.
When the flag is lowered, no part of it should touch the ground or any other object; it should be received by waiting hands and arms. To store the flag it should be folded neatly and ceremoniously.

The flag should be cleaned and mended when necessary. When a flag is so worn it is no longer fit to serve as a symbol of our country, it should be destroyed by burning in a dignified manner.
Note: Most A merican Legion Posts regularly conduct a dignified flag burning ceremony, often on Flag Day, June 14th. Many Cub Scout Packs, Boy Scout Troops, and Girl Scout Troops retire flags regularly as well. Contact your local American Legion Hall or Scout Troop to inquire about the availability of this service.

Displaying the Flag Outdoors
When the flag is displayed from a staff projecting from a window, balcony, or a building, the union should be at the peak of the staff unless the flag is at half staff.

When it is displayed from the same flagpole with another flag - of a state, community, society or Scout unit - the flag of the United States must always be at the top except that the church pennant may be flown above the flag during church services for Navy personnel when conducted by a Naval chaplain on a ship at sea.

When the flag is displayed over a street, it should be hung vertically, with the union to the north or east. If the flag is suspended over a sidewalk, the flag's union should be farthest from the building.

When flown with flags of states, communities, or societies on separate flag poles which are of the same height and in a straight line, the flag of the United States is always placed in the position of honor - to its own right.
..The other flags may be smaller but none may be larger.
..No other flag ever should be placed above it.
..The flag of the United States is always the first flag raised and the last to be lowered.

When flown with the national banner of other countries, each flag must be displayed from a separate pole of the same height. Each flag should be the same size. They should be raised and lowered simultaneously. The flag of one nation may not be displayed above that of another nation.

Raising and Lowering the Flag The flag should be raised briskly and lowered slowly and ceremoniously. Ordinarily it should be displayed only between sunrise and sunset. It should be illuminated if displayed at night.
The flag of the United States of America is saluted as it is hoisted and lowered. The salute is held until the flag is unsnapped from the halyard or through the last note of music, whichever is the longest.

Displaying the Flag Indoors
When on display, the flag is accorded the place of honor, always positioned to its own right. Place it to the right of the speaker or staging area or sanctuary. Other flags should be to the left.

The flag of the United States of America should be at the center and at the highest point of the group when a number of flags of states, localities, or societies are grouped for display.

When one flag is used with the flag of the United States of America and the staffs are crossed, the flag of the United States is placed on its own right with its staff in front of the other flag.

When displaying the flag against a wall, vertically or horizontally, the flag's union (stars) should be at the top, to the flag's own right, and to the observer's left.

Parading and Saluting the Flag
When carried in a procession, the flag should be to the right of the marchers. When other flags are carried, the flag of the United States may be centered in front of the others or carried to their right. When the flag passes in a procession, or when it is hoisted or lowered, all should face the flag and salute.

The Salute
To salute, all persons come to attention. Those in uniform give the appropriate formal salute. Citizens not in uniform salute by placing their right hand over the heart and men with head cover should remove it and hold it to left shoulder, hand over the heart. Members of organizations in formation salute upon command of the person in charge.
The Pledge of Allegiance and National Anthem
The pledge of allegiance should be rendered by standing at attention, facing the flag, and saluting.
When the national anthem is played or sung, citizens should stand at attention and salute at the first note and hold the salute through the last note. The salute is directed to the flag, if displayed, otherwise to the music.

The Flag in Mourning
To place the flag at half staff, hoist it to the peak for an instant and lower it to a position half way between the top and bottom of the staff. The flag is to be raised again to the peak for a moment before it is lowered. On Memorial Day the flag is displayed at half staff until noon and at full staff from noon to sunset.

The flag is to be flown at half staff in mourning for designated, principal government leaders and upon presidential or gubernatorial order.

When used to cover a casket, the flag should be placed with the union at the head and over the left shoulder. It should not be lowered into the grave.

Maverick Fan For Life

2011-06-13T12:27:00.000-04:00

National Champions!
Many Dallasites loose interest and turn our backs when our teams are not winning. But the owner of the Maverick's Basketball Team, Mark Cuban started a saying, "Maverick's Fan For Life" meaning we - (The Mav's Nation) root for the Mav's through the good times and bad - forever. He sets the example by always being there cheering them on to the very end, every year, every game of the season.
Last night was our night! The Dallas Maverick's won the NBA Championship and did it with class - so proud and excited to be a MFFL.

Mark Cuban allowed Mr. & Mrs. Carter (founding owners) to accept the Championship trophy.

MFFL
xoJoy

It's National Iced-Tea Day

2011-06-10T13:44:00.001-04:00

Tea-Time Manners

It's National Ice-Tea Day!

While iced tea is common place for Texans and Southerner's, (especially sweet tea!) it is important to know how to navigate Tea-Time.

Remember - to call it by it's proper name - Iced Tea (not Ice Tea) Yes, their is a d on the end ...

Oh, and if you order at Starbuck :
Short is the smallest(8 oz) but you'll probably only get this size if you ask for it by name; anyone asking for a "small" will get a Tall, which is the smallest size for which the prices are actually on the menu. Only hot drinks can be served in the Short size. Tall is 12 oz. This is what you'll get if you ask for a "small" drink. Grande is 16 oz. This is the "medium"size. Venti 20 oz. hot, 24 oz. cold. For some reason the iced Venti cups hold four more ounces; for this reason, Venti espresso drinks have an extra shot of espresso in them, and cost a few cents more than their hot equivalents.
What about tea-party's? (no not THE Tea Party - no political statement are on the agenda today)
First we must know tea terminology – there are various types of teas parties:

Afternoon Tea is served in the U.S. typically between the afternoon hours of three o’clock and five o’clock. A variety of teas are served along with three distinct courses – first, finger sandwiches are eaten, scones are next, and finally the sweet treat of pastries. In addition, afternoon tea is sometimes called “low tea” because it is served at low tables placed beside armchairs.

Afternoon tea has been around for many centuries, but became popular in the 1840’s by Anna, the seventh Duchess of Bedford, who suffered hunger pains during the long afternoons between lunch and the late evening meal. It became the “it “ thing to do and eventually turned into a social affair among the English aristocracy.

High Tea - remember the biggest faux pas is to refer to afternoon tea as “high tea.” (You will be looked down upon as a novice tea drinker) Often times the term “high tea” is misused by people who want tea-time to sound more refined. Note to self: “high tea” is a hearty, simple, sit-down meal that the Industrial Revolution workers of the 19th century originated. The workers came home in the late afternoon from the fields, factories, and mines starved after a long and hard day of work. Traditionally the high tea meal was served in the late afternoon. It was set-up family style with tea to drink and meat to eat, now known as a supper buffet.

Royal Tea is a choice of tea and a four-course menu of finger sandwiches, scones, sweets, desserts and a glass of champagne or sherry. The addition of the glass of champagne or sherry is the distinction of “royal tea.”

Light Tea is a lighter version of afternoon tea. The menu excludes the fingers sandwiches but includes scones, sweets, and of course a variety of teas.

There are various ways to serve the food at a tea. A savvy host knows an easy and elegant way to present each course is on a tiered stand. The first course eaten is from the bottom tier and we work our way up.

· The first tier (bottom) is reserved for the finger sandwiches.

· The second tier (middle) holds the scones.

· The third tier (top) is for the small pasties, tarts and other bite-size sweet desserts.

There are several “nevers” to remember:

· Never fill your cup to the rim – it will only spill onto the saucer creating a dilemma.

· Never stir so others can hear it. Do not allow the teaspoon to touch the sides of the cup. Quietly stir in a little figure-eight motion and place the spoon on the front-side of your cup.

· Never cradle the cup with your fingers.

· Never swirl the tea around in the cup as if it were a wine glass.

· Never-ever bounce the tea bag up and down in your cup to help the steeping process.

· Never drain a tea bag by winding the string around a spoon.

· Never place your empty cup, saucer and plate back on the tea table when you leave. The tea table is the display for the tea and food and should remain beautiful through the tea time.

There are also several “always” we should adhere to at tea-time:

· Always keep your tea cup and saucer close together, do not separate more than 12 inches apart. For example: if you are sitting on a sofa and lean back – pick up your saucer too, or if your stand up, do not leave the saucer sitting on the table.

· Always hold your saucer (with the teacup) in the palm of your hand at waist level and sip. (a silent sip!)

· Always request the tea bag be placed in the teapot first and the hot water added.

· Always pour tea in your cup first in order to judge the strength before adding lemon, sugar or milk.

· Always use lemon slices in your cup, instead of wedges.

· The handle of the spoon and the handle of the cup point to 4 o’clock.

· Always take your spoon out of your cup after stirring, then place your spoon in front of your cup

· Always request a saucer to hold the used tea bag, sugar wrappers or any disposables used.

· Always write your host a thank-you note after the tea party.

Hosting a tea in your home is a special way to entertain friends or even hold a business meeting. There is much to know about “tea-time” and this information will prepare you in advance and provide you the confidence needed to navigate the tea table.

Oh yes, and remember one more thing ... Do not raise your pinky finger up when holding a tea cup. It will guarantee you a place in the tea drinkers “hall of shame!”

Happy Weekend my friends - take time to smell the roses, hug your family, and drink iced tea.
xoJoy

Memorial Day Manners

2011-05-25T16:54:00.000-04:00

Memorial Day Manners
a.k.a ... BBQ Etiquette

For Host:

Be prepared – weather can change in a flash. Be prepared to head indoors.
Have supplies you need ready – don’t be running out for charcoal when guests arrive.
If cookout starts at 6pm – have some BBQ ready for tasting. Your guest will arrive hungry.
A successful BBQ must have real side dishes – potato chips do not count!
Use real plates or sturdy paper plates. Have plenty of napkins available.
The cook is king: Do try to tell the cook how to BBQ – you will not be invited back!

For Guest:

A hostess gift is still expected.
Wear jeans, shorts or something comfortable.
Put away your phone/text toy – free yourself for a few hours!
Include children only if they are invited. If so, prepare them before hand on rules of outdoor (swimming pool & playing) behavior.
If you are asked to bring a side-dish, make sure it is homemade or at least semi-homemade.
Be on time and go home at designated time.
Ask to assist with duties – don’t insist.
Leave the food your brought (or at least offer)
Don’t ask to pack up leftovers for your entire family.
Write a thank-you note to your host/hostess.

Bonus tip:
Refrain from using toothpicks - they are still not acceptable, even at a BBQ.

Memorial Day weekend is coming up - so, what are your plans?
xoJoy

Do What Your Mama Says!

2011-05-08T00:21:00.000-04:00

Our mother's gave us the best advice -

what advice did your mother give you?

xoJoy

Wedding Etiquette

2011-05-02T22:00:00.000-04:00

Every month is wedding month, but we are in full swing of the heights of wedding season. We must be at our best during this very special event in the lives of our friends and family.

Faux Pas for Bride and Groom:

Proposal should not be made by text!

Facebook:

Announcement of engagement should not be posted on Facebook before both family and close friends know about it.
Photo of engagement ring can be posted but not details of carat, cut, & clarity.
Do not ask friends to be in wedding on Facebook.
Do not announce wedding party on Facebook.
Photos of wedding are fine.
Link to your wedding website is not okay.
Posting the date of your wedding is fine.
Do not post the details unless you intend on inviting all your friends on Facebook.
Do not make your wedding a "Facebook" event for people to RSVP
Do not use Facebook to vent about those involved with the wedding
Do not update your status in the middle of your ceremony
Do not put registry info up on your profile (or on your shower or wedding invitation.

Other faux pas:

Not greeting guest. If you do not have a receiving line, try to speak to each guest. Do not plunge into a lengthy conversation – this is not the time.
Not sending thank-you notes for gifts. Believe it or not there are people who do not take the time to send a thank-you note to those who send gifts to honor their marriage. It is unacceptable to overlook sending a thank-you note as soon as you receive the gift.
Not sending the gift back to the giver if the wedding is canceled. Send a simple note stating that the wedding has been canceled, and along with the note, return any gifts you may have received. No explanation is necessary.

Faux Pas for guests:

Not sending in the RSVP card ASAP. It is crucial to send the response card immediately in order for the bride to plan the details of her wedding.
Being Late! "Better late then never" does not apply at weddings. Walking in while the wedding ceremony is being held is an absolute embarrassment to everyone.
Bringing babies or small children to a wedding. Crying babies and rambunctious children do not want to be at the event, nor do the bride and groom want them to destroy the romance of their wedding.
Dressing in solid white. Any way you look at it—it is still a faux pas to dress in solid white, even if the bride is not in white. It still sends a signal that you are competing with the bride. It is her day in the spotlight and white is reserved for the bride, whether she chooses to wear it or not.
Allowing your cell phone to ring. Turn your cell phone and pager off!
Leaving too early – Always stay to eat cake. This is considered a well wish and a blessing to the couple.
Not respecting cultural differences. If you attend a wedding not of your own culture, you must respect their customs.
Making wrong acknowledgements. Telling the bride “congratulations” is like saying to her, “You finally found a husband!” It is appropriate to greet the bride with “best wishes” and the groom with “congratulations.”

A Wedding to Remember:

Give your guest something to remember. At a minimum, your minister can add much inspiration to the ceremony.
Here are other ideas:
1. Take private dance lessons and dazzle your guest with a stunning first dance or even the entire wedding party can participate.
2. Don’t make your guest wait extensively while taking photos. Make sure to have great food and entertainment.
3. Provide a take small take-home treat.

Attention All Southern Girls!

2011-04-26T00:36:00.000-04:00

Bring Out The Bright White!

Attention Southern girls! (you know who you are) Easter has past and it is finally time to bring out the bright white, linen clothes and patent leather. FYI: Real Southern girls don't listen to what the world says about wearing bright white all year long we listen to what our Mama said.

HIgh-Heel Bunny Slippers

2011-04-20T00:14:00.002-04:00

Hippity-Hoppity Easter's on it's way!
Need an adorable Easter gift for your BFF? Here is it ... the High Heel bunny slipper. Here's the pink one - they come in black and baby blue too.

http://streetzieshighheelbunnyslippers.com/products-page-2/

BFF's Birthday

2011-04-01T22:29:00.000-04:00

When it's Katherine's birthday - We all have fun!

Gifts, Cake, Flowers, Cookies, Pedicures and Lunch at Jasper's.
Our lunch bunch celebrated a day early (her birthday is tomorrow) to get the Birthday Month rolling.

A super adorable and delicious Coco Chanel handbag cake from The Tart Bakery in Dallas.

The Lunch Bunch
Joy, Paige, Birthday Girl - Katherine, Peggy, Coco and Charlotte

Jasper's private glass wall room - beautiful!

Pedi's - at Celebrity Nails!

The best of friends love time together - doing everything or nothing at all.
I must know - what do you and your BFF's do for a good time?
xoJoy

A Tip for Placing Your Order

2011-02-25T23:22:00.000-05:00

Are you tired of eating chicken breast? Here's a cute idea!

Etiquette Tips for Ladies

2011-02-14T21:04:00.000-05:00

Money does not mean class!

Here are some basic tips a lady should remember on her Valentines date:

A lady will always be on time and will never hesitate to wait for a gentleman to pull out her chair or open a door for her.
She will face the people who are already in their seats when she makes her way down the row in a crowded theater. A lady never forces others to stare at her backside.
She won’t apply lipstick at the table—only in the powder room.
If she must excuse herself from the dinner table, she simply says, “Excuse me.” No further details are necessary. (don't say - "I'm going to the ladies room and I'll be back back," ... because everyone knows where you are going and they know you'll be back!)
If she must bend over to pick up something, she always bends from the knees—and never sticks her behind in the air.

Stay tuned - you know there are more tips to follow.

Happy Valentines Day!

xoJoy

Work It Baby!

2011-02-05T01:36:00.000-05:00

Welcome to February! Hopefully you are still working out at your local gym. Did you know that 17% of all those who sign up for a gym membership never go to the gym after they sign up - NOT good!

Discipline is doing what you don't want to do! Remember: Do it anyway!
Several posts back I asked you ~ What tips would you like to give the person working out next to you?

Here's your feedback of what NOT to do at the gym:

Going to the gym when you are sick. Ewww! There is no need to spread germs, especially in a place where people are trying to get healthy!
Not cleaning up after yourself. Towel off equipment before you leave, wipe up puddles you leave by the shower, toss disposable razors, and clean up any mess you make on the counters.
Changing the channel. How rude to assume you are the only one watching the TV. Someone could be involved in a show. Always check with others first if you want to change the television channel.
Hovering while someone is exercising. Don’t stand and stare at someone while you are waiting to use equipment he or she is using—just be patient.
Using gym towels as Kleenex. Another big Ewwww! This should not have to be mentioned, but unfortunately, it must: tissues are for noses, towels are for bodies. Do not confuse the two.

Keep up the consistent work-outs ~ you will be glad you did it!

xoJoy

What is Love?

2011-01-21T15:06:00.000-05:00

Faith, Hope, and Love.

But the greatest of these is LOVE! (1 Cor. 13:13)

Have a LOVELY weekend dear friends!

xoJoy

Workout Etiquette

2011-01-08T00:29:00.000-05:00

Happy 2011!
We are one week into the New Year. If your goal this year is to tone-up - JUST DO IT! Keep it going all year long - WORK IT BABY!

If you are working out in a gym then you already know when lots of people gather together in the same facility to workout, many basic courtesies are overlooked.
Here's what NOT to do ....
Faux Pas

Monopolizing the equipment. Be mindful of people waiting to use the equipment you are using.
Do not use more than one piece of equipment at a time, and do not sit on the weight machine between sets if others are waiting to use it.
Also, limit length of time on cardio equipment if there are people waiting.
Leaving weights on equipment.
Be sure to put your weights up after you use a machine, and put away all equipment you used in a class (steps, bands, weights, or towels, for example).
Saving equipment for others. Reserving equipment (such as treadmills or bikes in spin class) for friends is a definite faux pas! First come, first served!
Going the wrong way or in the wrong lane on the track. Walkers should take the inside lane and runners should stay to the out- side. Always pay attention to direction signs on the track, or if no signs are posted, go in the same direction as the rest of the people on the track.
Doing the “cell yell” while working out. No matter where you are—restaurant, bus, or gym—talking loudly into your cell phone is rude and disturbing to people around you.

Do tell - what tips would you like to give the person working out next to you?

More tips to come!

xoJoy

New Skis or Not?

2010-12-23T00:09:00.000-05:00

Tips Down the Hill - Colorado!

It was the perfect day of skiing - blue skies, no wind, no lines. Sounds like a perfect day - right? But not before JHW found he had left the car key in the ignition all night and the battery was very dead.

We had to call "Jeff" the only garage/gas station guy in this little town to come up and give our car a jump start. (will make front page of tomorrow's paper in this small town)

Then ... we finally get almost to the lift to find JHW's boots had busted wide open. (See third photo) Next, he had to be fitted for new boots, which meant new skis for him too. He is a "tips down the hill skier" and NEVER falls. With this new stuff - he fell three times today. Not fun getting up and putting yourself back together again.

But, with his new shiny boots and skis, it made me start thinking, maybe I want new boots and skis too! I have had my boots and skis since my early twenties. Ohmygoodness - lots has changed since then - I have managed to keep my cell phone # and my ski equipment (two of the few things consistent in my life:)

As for skiing - I am in control, tips down the hill (wahoo!) with my old stuff. Apparently my boots and skis are now vintage (I think they're cute) and can't be rented or bought anywhere. Very old - how distressing!

So, here's the question...I can see people in the ski line pointing and snickering at my ohso old ski equipment. Should I attempt to change and learn with new improved skis and boots, or should I keep ignoring the snickers of others and keep my old, but easy and comfortable boots and skis?

xoJoy

Tis the Season for Socializing-Part Two

2010-12-17T10:28:00.000-05:00

Etiquette Tips for Christmas Parties - The Socializing Season (Part Two)

In my last post I gave you five basic tips for success when invited and attending a party. Here are five more tips to help you feel polished for your next party.

RSVP/ASAP—Always respond within a few days of receiving an invitation. The host/hostess needs to know how many people will attend in order to plan the party. And never say ... "I am calling to RSVP" - say, "I am calling to respond to the invitation to your party."
Please keep your cell phone on manner mode at holiday parties. It is not impressive to “cell yell” over the crowd. If you must talk on your phone—go somewhere private.
Maintain a balanced conversation. Refrain from boring “business talk” or too much “kid talk.”
Prioritize socializing at holiday parties, instead of just eating and drinking.
Attempt to send a thank-you note for gifts within the first week if possible. However, thank-you notes are always better late than never!

Party on!

xoJoy

Tis the Season for Socializing!

2010-12-15T11:41:00.000-05:00

Etiquette Tips for Christmas Parties - The Socializing Season

The following tips are basic but easy to overlook.

Remember to adhere to these tips both personally and professionally during the holiday season.
1. Always err on the side of being conservative, especially when it comes to: a. Drinking b. Dressing c. Gift-giving Being excessive and extreme with any of these can cause you
much embarrassment.

2. You must attend your company Christmas party. This is a “must
attend” event and can be a career-killer if you decide not to
go—this shows disrespect for your company, supervisors, and
colleagues.

3. Thank the host/hostess for the party by: a. Bringing a gift to the host/hostess to show
your appreciation. b. Thanking the host/hostess before you leave
the party. c. Sending a thank-you note afterwards.

4. Give gifts that honor the recipients. Know their taste and always
give a well-thought-out gift.

5. When uncertain, call to confirm the proper “holiday attire.” This
term can have various meanings to different people. It could
mean anything from a sweater to holiday sequins.

Five tips today and five more to follow...
Merry Christmas - 10 more days ...
xoJoy

The Perfect Houseguest

2010-11-29T13:31:00.001-05:00

Houseguest Etiquette

Be the perfect houseguest and you will surely be invited back again.
Tips

Always take a well-thought-out gift and present it upon arrival to show your appreciation. Such thoughtfulness makes a great first impression!
Do not eat, drink, or use anything without asking first.
Find out immediately where your host wants you to park your vehicle during the daytime and overnight.
Never invite a guest or take a pet without discussing with your host or hostess. Your host may not love Fi-Fi or Benji as much as you do!
Refrain from smoking in someone else’s home. Always ask for an acceptable place you can smoke.
Do not expect to be waited on or served. Always offer to help with the household duties. For example, be sure to make your bed each day, keep the bathroom and other areas you use clean, and ask what to do with used towels and laundry.
Offer to buy groceries and/or pay for an evening out when you have an extended stay (more than three days).
Always (always!) send a thank-you note immediately after your visit.
Do not overstay your welcome. If you have the feeling it’s time to go, it probably is!

Dallas' Way To Start Thanksgiving!

2010-11-26T20:37:00.000-05:00

A Family Tradition!
It is the 5K (3.1 miles) Turkey Trot! JHW and I joined 35,000 of our closest friends for the 43rd annual YMCA Turkey Trot. It benefits all the Dallas area YMCA's, and a great big THANK YOU this year to Capital One Bank who was the big sponsor.

Save the date for next Thanksgiving Day 9am! It is an excellent way to give back to the community, have a super fun time, and burn off calories before even eating one bit of the Thanksgiving Meal! Hope to see you there!

xoJoy

Host and Hostess Etiquette

2010-11-24T21:25:00.000-05:00

Photo from Spenderosa

Company is Coming!

The holidays are here, and we must put on our best host and hostess hat! Get busy now and determine details with your upcoming holiday houseguests so there are no surprises.

Be the perfect host and hostess when you have over-night guests.
Tips

Before guests arrive, set expectations on details such as length of stay, daily routine, pets, eating habits, allergies, parking, etc.
Always have the guest room perfect when your guests arrive. Fresh flowers, chocolates, water, new magazines, books, stationery, towels and all toiletries they could ask for while visiting.
Let your guest know when meals will be served, and provide details on any meals that will be eaten out.
Show your guest around your home and be sure to include information and locations on snacks and drinks, extra blankets and towels, and all electronics including intrusion alarms, WIFI #'s, and remote controls.
Find out what your guests would like to do while visiting, and plan activities with their input.
Make sure your guests have a key or access to your home so they can come and go as they wish if they are going to be with you for an extended stay.
Discuss transportation needs with your guests, and provide a map of the city with points of interest shown.
Make sure your guests have privacy and time to themselves.
Most importantly—make your guests feel at home. Remember to treat them the way you would want to be treated.

Coming up on the next All Things Refined post - how to be a wonderful houseguest~

Until then ... happy hosting!

xoJoy

Neiman Marcus Coconut Cake

2010-11-20T22:52:00.000-05:00

Neiman Marcus + Cake = Delicious

I wanted to rub this cake on my face - it was delicious! You must add this to your bucket list. I'm not sure if it is offered in every Neiman Marcus restaurant, but if you are in Dallas make a special visit to Neiman Marcus Northpark to the Mermaid and have a piece (and one to go) of the coconut cake. Even if you are not a coconut fan (I'm not so much) but you will be after tasting this cake.

Have a delectable weekend!

xoJoy

The Secrets of Chanel No.5

2010-11-09T21:23:00.000-05:00

At Dallas’ most chic book club, the Adolphus French Room

Table #10

The Adolphus Hotel, located in downtown Dallas, one block from the Neiman Marcus flagship store hosts Authors at the Adolphus book review event. As usual, the Adolphus team did not disappoint! Tilar Mazzeo discussed her new (launched today) book entitled:“The Secret of Chanel No. 5: The Intimate History of the World’s Most Famous Perfume”

Harper-Collins describes her book best: Tilar goes back through time and deep into the life of Coco Chanel, the brilliant, controversial, and steel-willed businesswoman at the heart of the fragrance. She takes readers to the rose plantations and celebrated jasmine fields where the perfume begins and then to the laboratories and boardrooms where scent and sex are forever intertwined. And she travels to the heart of the Chanel empire: 31 Rue Cambon, Coco Chanel's flagship boutique, where six decades ago American GIs stormed the counters to possess the magical elixir that captured the luxury and romance of Paris for their girls back home. A blend of evocative history and thoughtful research, here is a glittering account of where art and sensuality mingle with dazzling entrepreneurship and desire: Chanel No. 5.

Katherine, Paige, our very own Coco and I had table #10 at The Adolphus French Room (be impressed - they received the highest rating ever of any restaurant in the United States by the Zagat Survey)
We had a super time! Between, Tilar, the conversation, the fabulous friendships, and the delicious halibut, it was a day to remember - chalked with glamorous memories, not soon to be forgotten.

Paige, Tilar, our Coco, Katherine

Joy, Paige, Tilar, Katherine, Coco

Tilar and Joy

You can follow Tilar Mazzeo on her blog, twitter or facebook.
xoJoy

Save The Date!

2010-11-07T22:29:00.000-05:00

It’s that time of year

to set a date for your upcoming
Thanksgiving or Christmas party,

or holiday event and send out a

hold-the-date card.

It's All About the Monogram!

2010-10-16T23:47:00.001-04:00

Here's an excellent etiquette question I received regarding monogramming.

JR asked: I have a question about monogrammed stationery, which initial do you use —your first name initial or your last name initial?

Dear JR - there's not a rule when you are selecting pre-engraved or embossed stationery. I could choose J for my first name or W for my last name. If you are sending the note from your entire family - your last name initial would be best.

More information on monogramming!

If you are engraving stationery or monogramming a shirt, bag or anything at all, the same rules apply when using your full initials.

Thank you for your question and let the monogramming begin!

xoJoy

The Basics - what I must know about monogramming!

If you want to use blocked letters in the monogram which are all the same size, your initials appear in order. JAW (these are my initials - Joy Ann Weaver - my husband says, this is God's sense of humor that my initials are JAW as in JAWS!
If you choose a monogram that has a larger center initial, the initial representing your last name appears in the middle with the initial of your first name on the left and your middle name on your right. JWA
If you are using your first initial and your husband's too - your first initials goes on the left and his on the right of your last name initial in the middle. JWJ (his name is James)
For a person with no middle initial, use a two letter monogram with both letters the same size. JW
For a person with two middle names, use a four letter monogram with all four letters the same size. Joy Ann Elizabeth Weaver would be monogrammed JAEW.
For last names with an apostrophe or "Mc" use the first letter of the last name. For O'Reilly, use "O" in the monogram or for McDowell, use "M".
For couples with a hyphenated last name, place the woman's first initial followed by the first letter of both last names slightly larger, and the man's first initial the same size as the woman's first initial.

Monogramming will always be in style and you must find a good monogrammer wherever you live. You can have almost anything monogrammed, whether with stitching, engraving or a peel-off sticker. Here's one of my favorite blogs and monogramming sites - enjoy!

www.2preppygirls.com

Southern Etiquette Rules and More ...

2010-09-13T01:50:00.001-04:00

A little history ...
Some of you know my mother died right after I was borne, my dad decided he did not want me so he gave me to his sister. Her name was Sally - she was "my mama". (1st rule of the South - your mother is called Mama) Sally was 60 when she took me to raise as her own. She had already raised six children of her own who were by then grown. We lived in remote west Texas and she raised me as an only child. I loved her and she love me. She taught me things I never dreamed I would be traveling the country teaching to others as my career. The values she taught me we're never referred to as "The Rules of Etiquette", it was just the way things were done - common sense.

Here are some examples:

Treat others the way you want to be treated. (later to find out, that one is in the Bible - Luke 6:31)
Always be nice to those who aren't nice to you. This one has paid off big time! (hey, that one is in the Bible too - read Matt: 5:44)
Do your best! (now I know why I stay confused whether my mama said it or if it comes from The Bible - See Col:3:23)
People will let you down - God won't. (come to think of it, she was teaching me Scripture all along, I just didn't know it - Matt:28:20)

At an early age, she taught me to set a table properly, write a thank-you note immediately, and put away white after Labor Day (always my birthday weekend). We brought out our linen clothes and patent leather after Easter each year. The reason was never discussed and I never asked why - it was just the way we did it.

Here's a question asked on my "Just Ask Joy" email regarding dress after Labor Day.

Dear Joy,

I read your "Socially Savvy" book, follow your blog, and your Tweets too. Here's my question: With so many people claiming to be fashion experts, there are no firm rules to follow. Can you tell me traditional fashion rules since you are a Texas/Southern girl.

Thank you,

Hello RT, Thank you for your question.
Let me give you some valuable traditional information below, then we will ask our audience what traditional values and rules of etiquette their Mama taught them!
Traditional Rules for dressing after Labor Day:

No linen
No white clothing (not to be confused with winter white, champagne, or cream - of course you can wear white shirts, but not linen)
No white handbags
No white shoes
No white watches
No flipflops
No patent leather - shoes or handbags
No straw bags or hats
No seersucker
No madra shorts or tank tops

This was switch-out weekend. I switched out summer to fall clothing.

Here's a glimpse of my shoe closet before the switch-a-roo.

Before the switch-a roo

Spring and summer shoes from closet waiting to be packed for annual trip to storage

Summer suits and dresses

Bright white and linen clothing - off to storage

I could not resist showing you this picture of Scooter (my snoopy cat) sticking his head out of part of the wall closet mirror during the switch. Do you see his head? (middle right - he is black and white)

Okay - now it is your time! Please advise RT and me about your traditional values and rules of etiquette that you were taught.

Love and hugs to you,xoJoy

Personally and Professionally Polished

2010-09-10T11:07:00.001-04:00

via iheartpictures

Proper Introductions

Do you want to be perceived as polished personally and professionally - here's valuable information you can use to make a proper introduction.

I received several questions this week regarding proper introductions.
Here are some very valuable introduction tips :
(Socially)
Women and men should always stand when introduced, look the person in the eye and smile.
Shake a woman and man's hand the same, straight up and down. Extend a firm (not a bone crusher) handshake to show respect.
Never use an honorific such as Ms., Mr., or Dr. to introduce yourself. (Example: A doctor should never introduce himself/herself as Dr. Jones, but the person making an introduction gives the honorific of Dr. Jones.)
Socially: a woman’s name is said first in the introduction: Sally Smith this is Paul Miller.
Keep introductions equal. If you use Ms. Jones, use Mr. Smith. Never say Mr. Smith this is John. It is best to use first and last names when making introductions.
It is important to create common ground between the two people you are introducing so they can springboard into their own conversation. Then you can excuse yourself and let them carry on a conversation.

(Business)
The most important persons name is said first. Introduction is based on rank, not gender or age.
Correct: Ms. President, I would like to introduce Mr. Vice President
(never add “to you” in the previous sentence – it places the emphasis on the wrong person) Incorrect: Ms. President, I would like to introduce to you Mr. Vice President” FYI -
When making a very formal introduction, such as dignitaries use the word "present" instead of the words "this is" or "introduce."

NEVER use the word "meet" when introducing people. When using the word "meet" to introduce someone, it always throw the emphasis toward to the wrong person.
For example, in reading the following sentence you can’t tell who is the CEO and who is the newly hired employee. "Jack Jones, I would like you to meet John Smith." Which person is the most important person in this sentence? Is Jack or John the CEO?
Rather, for an informal introduction, use the words "this is" as the bridge between the most important person's name said first and introducing the second person. "Jack Jones this is John Smith, our new staff member. Mr. Jones is our CFO."
The client, guest or visitor outranks the boss or co-worker and should be introduced first.

A note to All Things Refined readers: The protocol of proper introductions is difficult to understand. I wish I could explain to each of you in person to make it easier for you.

Have a wonderful weekend my well refined friends!

Joy

Polish up!

Tex-Mex

2010-09-05T22:44:00.000-04:00

Your Favorite Mexican Food?
Just arriving back in Texas - the first stop is always Mexican Food.
I have a list of my favorite and I know you do too!
What is your favorite Mexican Food Restaurant and what do you order?
This is serious business!
For me: Cheese Enchiladas at Mi Cocina.
I also like Uncle Julio's and La Hacienda Ranch
Remember: you can tell if a Mexican Food Restaurant is good or not by the chips and hot sauce they serve! If they get that wrong ...don't expect much!

www.mcrowd.com/micocina.shtm

Handbag Etiquette

2010-07-29T01:10:00.000-04:00

What you must know ...

Do you have “Purse-onality?” We have always heard, "you are what you eat” and "clothes make the woman,” but for “purse-driven” women there is nothing more accurate to say than ... “You are your handbag!”

Whether it is a tote, a shoulder bag, a handle bag, or a clutch, our handbags are a combination of form, function and fashion. Many do not know there are rules of etiquette to follow regarding your “purse-onality!

The difference in a handbag and a purse. (a purse is under $100.) Never go into Neiman Marcus and ask for their purse department - they don't have one!
Never place handbags on dining table or conference table. (huge faux pas)
Carry/hold your handbag on your left side. Leaving your right hand/arm available for socializing. (think of the Queen - she knows to carry her handbag on her left arm)
Place handbag on the right side of chair when seated in a restaurant.
Never hang handbag over the back on your chair.
Clutch should be placed in lap or in seat behind you.
When to carry a clutch vs tote. A clutch is high maintenance and used for limited basics. Totes are many sizes and can also be used as briefcases.
How to change bags quickly. Using the easy “Inner-Purse”
Keep handbags clean! (germ-free) Handbags/purses can be germ collectors - think of all the place they are set through-out the day. Depending on the material, use a bacterial wipe or spray. Some bags can be dry cleaned.
Never ask if someone’s handbag is real or how much it cost!

Just adore this bag! The Tory Burch Reva in the brown reptile print! I bought it at the beginning of the summer and have enjoyed it until my recent aforementioned bag in my last blog. (what's up with the reptile theme?) More power over the reptile - I suppose.

(Pardon my red toes at the bottom of the picture - oops!)

xoJoy

Shhh! Don't Tell My Husband

2010-07-24T07:00:00.009-04:00

Power Over The Python!

If you know me, you know I'm cuckoo for cocoa puffs over handbags. Yes - I dream in handbags! I'll never have enough, but according to my darling JHW I have "way to many bags" - (oh quit cussing!)

Poor thing - he had to have my closet extended last fall to accommodate all my babies. He has also tried to shame me out of my lustfulness. Can you believe it? It will never work, actually, I believe handbags are biblical! Read Luke 12:33 (niv) ... provide purses for yourself that will not wear out ..."

How can you argue with that?!

Okay - now that I know you are onboard with me - I am going to share my latest secrets with you. Shhh - don't tell JHW!

First, I am NOT a snake person, in fact I HATE snakes, so to be dreamy over this bag was a big surprise to me. I HAD TO HAVE IT! Perhaps it is a feeling of "power over the python" that makes this bag so yummy. Go to Michael Kors and see for yourself - it is Python fabulous.

Okay - so while I was at it, I decided to keep going with the whole "power over the python" ~~defense~~ ~~explanation~~ thing and take home a pair of python shoes too.

I love heels but, these Michael Kors pythons (kind of like driving shoes) are the coolest and beyond cushy. I don't want to take them off ... think I'll sleep in them tonight :)

Oop! Gotta run...

This is our secret - SO SHHHH.... DO NOT TELL MY HUSBAND!

Love and hugs,

xoJoy

Michael Buble

2010-07-19T13:27:00.000-04:00

In celebration of "The Coco's" birthday month - Gregory (her wonderful son) treated us (including Coco's sister, Regina) to almost everything on the menu at the W's trendy "Craft" restaurant, and .... floor passes to the coveted Michael Buble concert at the American Airlines Center in Dallas. It was nothing less than FABULOUS!

I loved that Mr. Buble was sincerely grateful to his audience. He has spectacular manners, very charming, and extremely funny too. He won my heart with his sincerity and did I mention the boy has a set of pipes that did not need a microphone. Get this ... In his last song he put down the microphone and belted out the words so loudly - I know everyone in the rafters and Oklahoma could hear him.

Dallas was his last stop on his "Crazy Love" tour and how did he know my favorite song of all was his last song - "Singing This Song for You."

I will forever be a Michael Buble fan!

Thank you Gregory for a super perfect evening!

The best host in the world award goes to ...... Gregory!

Thank you for allowing us to celebrate in COCO style! You made three women very happy and the memories with be with us forever.

xoJoy

Rocky Mountain High

2010-07-08T01:26:00.000-04:00

Today I met a girl in Aspen who has lived here her entire life. She wants to move to Galveston, Texas - WHAT? I don't understand it! I get that she wants "the beach" but how could she leave this paradise.

Colorado - I love you!

God must have had a really fun time creating you.

Our Rocky Mountain High temperature almost reached 70 today.
Dallas, you will always be home to me - but I can see why Big D empties and heads to the Colorado hills. I'll promise to never get use to this beautiful scenery and perfect weather.

More later on the Aspen/Snowmass Village hometown 4th of July Parade.
xoJoy

It's Suzy Welch!

2010-06-25T01:08:00.000-04:00

Do you know Suzy Welch? If not, you must get to know her by following her on twitter and buying her (decision-making) book 10/10/10.

In a random set of circumstances Suzy began making decisions in her crazy-busy life based on looking at questions from the prospective of 10 minutes, 10 months and 10 years. This decision-making process became her way of creating a life of her own making. 10/10/10 is learning to approach making choices with a new way of thinking and in-turn getting priorities right!

Her husband is the great Jack Welch, former Chairman of the Board of GE Capital. I have read all of his books - an amazing career and he gives much glory to his mother. Then, you know he has gotta be a good guy!

Suzy was the keynote speaker at the Women Business Enterprise National Convention in Baltimore. I got to shake her hand and have a little live chat with her at thte 10/10/10 book signing. A great personality and a live wire! Here's our pic ...

Signed: To Joy, Manners DO Matter, Your BFF, Suzy Welch

(the BFF part is a little twitter side joke)

Happy or Sad

2010-06-20T22:49:00.000-04:00

It's Father's Day - a very special and happy day for those who had a great dad and for those who did not - it is over-rated and sad.

In most cultures - "So goes the dad - So goes the family." Families can change as a result of a father changing.

Our friend Neal Jeffrey's grandfather was an alcoholic who abandon their family completely. Neal's dad made a choice to lead a different life. He was an affirming and loving husband and dad, who had his family in church every Sunday and prayed with them daily. Neal's dads choices changed not just his legacy, but generations to come.

Neal has made an incredible impact on our lives too. Ten years ago, I remember him saying, "Couples, if you are not praying together, don't expect much out of your relationship." James and I were just dating at the time, but committed our relationship to praying together daily. Two months later we were engaged and then married in another two months. To this day we pray together - every morning. Prayer changes things!

http://www.nealjeffrey.com/IF_I_CAN_Neal_Jeffrey_products.htm

2010-06-19T05:24:00.000-04:00

It's the middle of the night and I can't sleep!

I'm leaving you a "pink" weekend mid-night message -

Happy Weekend!

Saturday morning is coming and I want to take a ride down to the farmers market for flowers.

Who wants to go?

Image by La Belle

Believe it!

2010-06-06T00:01:00.000-04:00

And we know that in ALL things God works for the good of those who love HIM... Rom 8:28

Polish Dallas

2010-06-03T00:25:00.001-04:00

I just had the pleasure of presenting a Socially Savvy session to Polish Dallas - a fabulous organization of young professional woman in the city. While navigating the corporate world, setting goals, and following dreams can be a challenge for some women - these girls have their heads on straight. They understand that success and integrity go hand in hand, and that faith in the workplace does exist. It was a fantastic place to see our young women seeking The Truth in a corporate setting. The fact of the matter is - you can't put your faith on the shelf Monday - Saturday. Our faith is a full-time faith!

Polish Dallas has bi-monthly meeting at the TowerClub in Downtown Dallas - go check it out! www.polishdallas.org

Socially Savvy Book Signing

Socially Savvy

Thank-You Note Etiquette

Hello Beautiful!

What's Your Word?

Host/Hostess Etiquette Tips

Merry Christmas to You

Dinner Party Etiquette

Stay Calm & Sparkle On!

Thankful for YOU!

Thanksgiving Manners

Party Etiquette Tip

Engagement Party Etiquette

Kathy Ireland

Partner's Card

Laduree

Burnt Orange Eiffel Tower

The French Will Never Forget

iSad - RIP Steve Jobs

The brilliant Steve Jobs passed away today. It is a great reminder that life is fleeting and no matter how smart or rich we are, we must be prepared.

10 Golden Lessons From Steve Jobs

My LV Birthday Cake

Two Weeks Until Paris

Double the Fun!

Happy Flag Day!

Maverick Fan For Life

It's National Iced-Tea Day

Memorial Day Manners

Do What Your Mama Says!

Wedding Etiquette

Attention All Southern Girls!

HIgh-Heel Bunny Slippers

BFF's Birthday

A Tip for Placing Your Order

Etiquette Tips for Ladies

Work It Baby!

What is Love?

Workout Etiquette

New Skis or Not?

Tis the Season for Socializing-Part Two

Tis the Season for Socializing!

The Perfect Houseguest

Dallas' Way To Start Thanksgiving!

Host and Hostess Etiquette

Neiman Marcus Coconut Cake

The Secrets of Chanel No.5

Save The Date!

More Etiquette Answers!

It's All About the Monogram!

Southern Etiquette Rules and More ...

Personally and Professionally Polished

Tex-Mex

Handbag Etiquette

Shhh! Don't Tell My Husband

Michael Buble

Rocky Mountain High

It's Suzy Welch!

Happy or Sad

Believe it!

Polish Dallas